The Power of Friendships

Today was the last day of MOPS for the 2011-2012 school year.  We had a few of the ladies share their stories 'how I became the mother I am'.  All of three of them were so very touching.  One gal shared about how she woke up at 5wks pregnant with heavy spotting.  My heart skipped a beat, and I'm sure my breath caught.  And as she told the story of how not only was she afraid of losing her baby, her eldest had been 'misplaced' at church and she was frantically running around looking for her child asking God if she was supposed to lose both of her babies that day.  Thankfully, her baby lived, and her child was found.

All of the sudden I was right back to my own story.  Bleeding, but not knowing whether life remained.  And also remembering how terrified I was that day of losing my oldest as well when she didn't come home from school and no one could find her.  I can imagine there was a lot of raw emotion on my face as those memories came flooding back.  Then my dear friend Rebecca caught my hand and just held it through the rest of the speaker's story.  I didn't tell her how much I needed that.  She won't have a clue (unless she reads this) that her holding my hand got me through the speaker, helped me keep my composure.  What a testament to the power of a true friend.  She knew my pain and reached out to me in such a simple, but powerfully needed way.  Rebecca always says that women need each other, boy was that true for me today!

I have been reflecting on friendship this week.  See, after the miscarriage I took a long break from Facebook.  It was a time that I needed to crawl inside of myself to grieve.  Sure I felt lonely and disconnected, but I have never felt closer to my Maker than I did in those months.  I have 'reconnected' with Facebook in the last week.  At first I told myself only at night.  Then it was only during times when Wesley was nursing.  Then all of the sudden I am finding myself checking Facebook every few hours, looking to see if anyone has posted.  I am especially curious about posts in a few of the groups I am involved in.  I wouldn't call myself obsessed with Facebook, but I can see that it has taken an unhealthy role in my daily life.  I just want to know what other people are doing, and it just strikes me as odd that I am more interested about people from distant pasts, or strangers whom I've never met instead of my friends.  I realized that I haven't reached out and met up or called many people this week, because I was finding friendship fulfillment through cyber relationships!

What a sad culture we live in that we are more connected with our devices than people.  That we would rather read about or watch others lives on a screen than know our next door neighbors.  I am guilty.  In the almost three years we've been on our block I have only met people from four of the eight houses that are in the cul de sac.

I don't know how to change our society, but I can be the change I want to see right?  I can choose to seek out people instead of screens.  My computer will never give me a hug or a shoulder to cry on.  Because when I see ((((hugs)))) on the screen, I sure don't feel comforted.  It just makes me feel more alone and isolated.

I am not a rock, I am not an island.  I am a woman who needs the power of her friends to carry her through this life, as only friends can do.